As the blogger and photographer behind Living Outside the Stacks, I independently select and write about stuff I love and things I think you’ll enjoy too. Living Outside the Stacks has affiliate and advertising partnerships so I get revenue from sharing this content and from your purchase. Thank you for your support.
I struggled with this post because I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be serious or frivolous. I wasn’t sure if I should share details about my personal traumas or just skim over the surface. I opted, obviously, to be serious and give enough details about my story so that you know that I’ve been there.
I’m not saying I have it all figured out. In fact, I know that I don’t. I have a lot of things I need to work out, but the one thing I’m trying to get better about is protecting my emotional and physical peace. So, despite the fact that I almost never ask for nor give advice, I’m sharing the best piece of advice I’ve ever seen and it comes from Facebook of all places.
ABOUT WHERE BLOGGERS LIVE
Welcome to the monthly edition of Where Bloggers Live. It’s kind of like HGTV’s “Celebrities at Home,” but…Bloggers! Who doesn’t like to peek behind the scenes and see inside people’s homes? Over the next few months, we’ll share about our work spaces, home towns, and more!
I should note – because this is super important – the creative brain behind this project is Bettye at Fashion Schlub! Love her!
The Celebrity Bloggers
Bettye at Fashion Schlub
Daenel at Living Outside the Stacks
Jodie at Jodie’s Touch of Style
Iris at Iris’s Original Ramblings
Leslie at Once Upon a Time and Happily Ever After
Sally at Within a World of My Own
Make sure you visit everyone to see where the magic happens!
THE PROMPT: The best advice I’ve ever received
To my fellow humans, I want you to know, I see you and I’ve been you. I’ve suffered through sexual abuse at the hands of a man who was supposed to protect me. I’ve been physically assaulted by a stranger because I refused a date. I’ve had doctors dismiss my concerns and fail to take my complaints seriously until it was almost too late. I’ve been called racial slurs by people who should have known better. And through each of these experiences, I’ve learned one crucial lesson that I cannot emphasize enough – we must prioritize our own protection, no matter the circumstances.
In the past, I haven’t spoken up every time that something has happened because I didn’t want to be seen as aggressive or cause a scene that could ruin the perpetrator’s life or career, but that has left me feeling far more angry and hurt than any embarrassment would’ve caused. There are times when I replay incidents and I think, I should’ve said this or I should’ve done that. I know that second guessing doesn’t fix the past all I can do is move forward and share what I’ve learned. Which leads me to the post that I saw on Facebook…. It was a random “For you” kind of posts from someone I don’t know or follow and all it said was:
You don’t owe anyone politeness.
That declaration hit my head and my heart. My physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being takes priority over the perpetrator’s discomfort.
So, I say to you, in situations where you feel unsafe, such as being followed or even seeking medical care, you are ultimately responsible for your own safety. We live in a world where women, especially, are being forced to surrender their autonomy, we cannot do that. We must not do that.
Make a scene. Raise your voice. Do whatever it takes to take care of you. Politeness isn’t an option when it comes to your safety. You are valuable and you are worth fighting for. I know that now and I hope you do too.
I’d love to read your answers to the prompt, please share in the comments below.
AFFILIATE INFORMATION
As the blogger and photographer behind Living Outside the Stacks, I independently select and write about stuff I love and things I think you’ll enjoy too. Living Outside the Stacks has affiliate and advertising partnerships so I get revenue from sharing this content and from your purchase. Thank you for your support.
THANK YOU
Thank you for stopping by my blog. I hope you enjoyed this post and learned something new. If you like what you read, please consider sharing this post on Facebook or Twitter. You can also share on Pinterest. While I pay for many of the items I share on this blog out of my own pocket, some items are gifted to me {I always disclose those items}.
Come back soon,
LET’S CONNECT
Click Here to See Where I Link Up